the ancient art of hospitality & assessment
Banquet scene in a fresco from Herculaneum, Italy. The woman wears a transparent silk gown while the man to the left raises a rhyton drinking vessel. Made c. 50 BCE, during the Late Roman Republic. Le Musée absolu, Phaidon. 59 (23 in) x 53 cm (20).
One month ago, our family moved to Italy as missionaries, working with friends and local churches and organizations to fight the good fight against human trafficking. From the moment I landed in Naples on the plane, I was greeted with Italian hospitality and gratitude as the passengers gave a warm applause to the pilot for getting us there safely. Friends then picked us all up in their vehicles to take us to our new home an hour north of the airport. We were greeted with happy lights shining out in the dark in our new home that we had never seen before. Our new landlords, Nonno Lino and Nonna Maria, bought us pizza to eat. My friend Joyce joined her to make the beds for us with the bedding they had acquired. We were given safe transportation, food and drink, showers (with soap and towels!), safe accommodations to rest, and genuine care for our family of six after having traveled a long distance. We were overwhelmed with their hospitality. Soon after we hosted them for a picnic and I invited my neighbor in to join us and she excused herself and ran home to grab a bottle of Prosecco to give to us as a gift just to enter my home. When my guests arrived, they would say "permesso?" (permit?) before crossing the threshold of any door in my home, even though I had already invited them over. AnnaRita, my long time friend and daughter of our landlords, explained to me that this is customary and considered polite manners of hospitality to honor your host. These kinds of hospitality have been ingrained into the Italian culture since ancient times and there is an expectation of hospitality woven into the fabric of their society.
Hospitality scene, from the Collection of Greek Vases by Mr. Le Comte de Lamburg (Paris, 1813-1824).
The Italians learned this hospitality from the ancient Romans who adopted it from the ancient Greeks. The Greek word for hospitality is Xenia [zee-nee-uh], stemming from the word xenos, which means stranger. It was so woven into their culture that there were actual standards to abide by that were taught to the masses and can still be found in ancient writings. Zeus was the patron god of xenia and was said to visit the people in disguise. You were expected to treat any stranger as if you were serving the gods themselves. The two basic rules or forms of xenia are for the host and the guest. Hosts were to honor their guests by providing the strangers and sojourners that arrive at their home with a bath, food, drink, gifts, and safe escort to the next destination, much like what I received when arriving in Italy. It was considered rude to ask guests questions or even to ask their name before they had attended to their basic human needs. Guest were to honor their host by being curteous, abstaining from being a threat or a burden, and by sharing part of themselves with stories and news from the outside world. Most importantly, guests were expected to reciprocate if their hosts were to ever call upon them in their homes.
Ravenna, San Vitale, Ospitalità di Abramo e Sacrificio di Isacco
All cultures have some form of hospitality. Even the Bible gives examples of xenia in both the Hebrew and the Greek. Remember when Abraham and Sara entertained angels in human disguise? Remember Paul referring to the lodging (Greek word xenia) on his missionary trips? Remember how he admonishes us as believers to offer hospitality to strangers that are often angels that we are unaware of in Hebrews? Remember how Jesus told us that when we offer food and drink to the least of these, we are offering it to Him? What if these forms of hospitality transcend our earthly bodies? When we have Christ within us, we are entertaining God Himself with hospitality every time we entertain stranger and family alike. Could these forms of hospitality apply even to assessment within your home as a homeschooler? There are indeed, forms of hospitality that exist in assessment for both the assessor and assessee, formal or informal. To adhere to these forms is to participate in an exchange of gifts with man and God.
Bartolomeo Pinelli (Italian, 1781-1835) (W. M. BRADY & CO)
Assessment comes from the Latin word, assidere, to sit beside. Anytime you sit beside someone, you are assessing, either the right way or the wrong way. Just like the host, the assessor has forms to follow and expectations laid upon them. They are expected to engage with the person beside them. They are expected to watch and pay individual attention. They are expected to be kind, to be courteous and to honor the human sitting before them as the image of God Himself. They are expected to offer food and drink, or rather nourishment to the soul. As assessors, we facilitate truth, goodness, and beauty, and participate in laying the table for the feast of the Lord. "Come, let us reason together." He invites us to His feast and the assessor either facilitates the hospitality needed in order to be nourished or shuts the door to the hungry and thirsty wanderer.
The assessee has a form to follow too. They are not to be a burden or a threat to the assessor. They have to want to be nourished, to eat. No one can force someone to actually dine at the feast but can only offer an invitation. The assessee has to humble themselves for help. It is not easy to show up on the doorsteps of a stranger to ask and receive assistance. My own recent journey to Italy attests to that! In exchange for the hospitality of their host, they are expected to be vulnerable, to give of themselves to the host. In order for xenia to guide the assessment, an act of humility is required of the assessee to truly share themselves and their business, and open themselves up to receive nourishment from their assessor.
When we abide by these forms, as host and guest, assessor and assessee, we participate in a divine exchange of gifts with man and God. The first gift, the gift of honor, acknowledges the expression of God in man. When we treat our fellow man with love and respect, we exchange honor towards one another and God. The second gift, the gift of friendship, offers community. Strangers build community when they trust the form of hospitality first and then build trust with each other through experience. The third gift, the gift of growth, perceives the potential that each one of us was created with. We each have a divine purpose and when assessor and assessee accept the invitation to assessment, with God and His forms of hospitality, we grow into that divine purpose.
Understanding the forms of hospitality in assessment, both for the assessor and assessee, positions ourselves to be ready to receive the gifts exchanged by practicing these forms. When ancient cultures violated the standards of xenia long ago, they believed that you invited curses upon you and your home. When you followed the rules of xenia, you were rewarded by the gods. Likewise, when you violate these forms of xenia in assessment, you invite discord and danger to the relationship. Most of us were taught how to assess incorrectly and did not receive training in the forms of hospitality that are necessary to foster honor, friendship, and growth. Taking the time to be aware of these forms, to learn how to practice these forms, and how to teach your loved ones how to practice these forms is possible!
I can help you! Please join me in an online conference that will give you the opportunity you are looking for. Tools for Transcripts is an online conference to teach you xenia in assessment and help you learn how to take those assessments and put them in a visual snapshot of your child's high school career we call the transcript. Trusting xenia hospitality and the God that teaches us these forms enables us to gain honor, friendship, and growth with our students and children. Please visit https://www.classicaltools4change.com/toolsfortranscripts to register for our 1 hour and 6 hour classes today!
